My Supports
Similar to my post about my
important relationships, my husband, mother and friends provide many essential
supports for me daily. My greatest support is certainly my husband.
Financially, he earns the most to support our family with a home, vehicles and
more. My job supports our need to have groceries, household goods, clothes and
shoes as well as be available for our children. Overall, we are a team, we care
for our family financially, and we do our best to meet all our children’s and
each other’s needs together. Additionally, he is a jack of all trades and is
able to fix or build anything we need, saving us worry and money. Most
importantly, he is my emotional support; when I am feeling down or stressed he
picks me up with his silliness, help and love. My mother, my in-laws and my friends are additional
sources of support to care for my children, as well as emotional support. A friendly rapport, and good advice is often needed from friends to maintain sanity! I am certain that if we were in a time of need my friends and extended family would help with my
children, our meals, running around, and even financial needs. It is a blessing
to know you have caring people in your life.
Our jobs provide financial comfort,
providing us with the means to have all other necessary physical supports. Having
a home and vehicles are essential layers of support for our family as well. We
have chosen to live in an area where public transportation does not exist, so
vehicles are essential for work and running errands. Around the house there is
always a lot to do. Having a plan to involve all family members with keeping up
the house allows me to keep my sanity. I believe sharing the household responsibilities
is a necessary support within a family. There are probably a few dozen things
that I could point out as being essential in my day to day life, things like my
tea kettle and such, my refrigerator, beds, my computer and cell phones. Each
time one of these is broken or missing I am reminded how much I rely on these
tools for supporting life as I know it. The times I have been without a
computer and needed to drive to the library for computer tasks I was grateful
that it was only temporary. Similarly, the times I have been without a cell
phone, and had to find a rare payphone or rely on the kindness of strangers, I
was again grateful for those supports, and that it was only temporary.
I cannot really fathom a life
without my supports. However, I do know that life goes on, you adjust to the
loss, and you find new sources to support new needs. I know this because three
year ago we received a life changing call to tell us my sister had lost her leg
in a motorcycle accident. She spent nearly two years in military hospital
recovery programs, with our mother by her side. Our mother left her career and
threw financial stability out the window to care for her child. My parents
ended up relying on a lot of charitable help to keep their home, while my
father worked to make as much money as he could, and adjust to living alone for
a while. They relied on friends, family and military supports in many ways.
Meanwhile, my sister adjusted to life on one leg. First living in the hospital,
then back with our parents; ramps were built, crutches, prosthetics, wheel
chairs and many other devices and tools were purchased to make life accessible
again. A very long journey, a many layers of support later, she is now
successfully living on her own, in a home she bought for herself. In her own
home she made everything as accessible as possible on her level while in her wheelchair.
It is a work in progress. She had to retire from the Marine Corps, and started
a new career, only to realize a desk job really was not right for her. As she
uses a service dog to support her both physically and emotionally, she decided
to follow her passion and open a dog training kennel business. I am amazed
daily at her drive to go on and follow her passion even though it is full of
physical difficulties. Life goes on if you feel you have the emotional,
physical, and financial support and mental strength to persevere.
